Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Operation Organization

It has been a few weeks since I last posted about my home organization project. I have beeen working on it although not as hard as I would like. I am absolutely spent when I come home from work right now. It is more emotionally draining than anything. Although, I have been running around like a chicken with my head cut off for about three weeks now. So I am adding to my mission. I am now trying to simultaneously organize my home and my life. I tackled the boys room which took me the better part of a week. I learned that I need to do it all in one sitting or in two seperate but smaller purposeful sittings with specific goals for each. My daughter is now begging me to do her room. The younger of the two boys who share the room is a Messy Marvin and never cleans anything up. I took him to Target with me to purchase some organizers. He asked for a specific blue three drawer cart style. I told him that I would agree to buy it for him, if he agreed to clean the room. When we got home, he begged me to clean and organize the room. I finally did the next day and he was right there with me filling the organizer with what I asked. He knows where it all goes. And today for the first time I asked him to clean up his room and he did! Amazing! I am sure the novelty will wear off. It always does, but now I have hope. He has done it and knows he can do it. I threw out two trash bags full of "stuff" and there are only toys that are truly played with and they are now being played with properly! I am loving it! So, my daughter wants me to organize and clean her room. I do it regularly because it is always a disaster. But, I will go through it like I never have before. My goal is to get rid of all the Littlest Pet Shop toys. I am not holding my breath. But, maybe she will agree. There are a ton!

As for my life, it is in serious need of a make over. I have not been truly happy with my career for a long time and I have finally admitted it and am ready to make a change. I have to work outside the home. I don't have a choice, but I do have a choice in what I do. I always said the most important thing was the schedule so I could be home for the kids. But, if I am consumed by a feeling of sadness and disappointment in what I do when I am not with them, but I can't be a good mom if I am not happy. I can't be a good mom if when I am with them I am disconnected. A co-worker made me realize this. However, I have the power to change it. I need to continue to teach, but I have decided to start my own photography business. I am nervous. Nervous I will not be any good at it. I am nervous it will not take off or that I don't have the skills to make it happen. But, I have to try. I love photography and am motivated to take amazing photographs and for an amateur I think I am pretty good at it. I still have along way to go, but I am refreshed at the idea that there is light at the end of this dark teaching tunnel. I recently reminded myself that I student taught so I had a teaching certificate to fall back on. I never intended it to be my career. I loved my husband and adired him for going back to school, going into debt, and changing from a high paying, high profile career to teach because it was his passion. However, I was not strong enough to do that. Maybe I am now.

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